2.21.2010

I remember the day

I remember the day I found myself. 
A few months after ending what I thought was a true love, a few months before leaving college, and a few months after losing a best friend. 
I sat alone. 
My college had a hidden labyrinth in the woods behind the school and it was a great place to sit and ponder, collect and regain the wandering thoughts that whisked through my confused and tired collegiate mind.  Which road would I take. I could no longer afford the path I was on, and the one I had laid out just wasn't where I wanted to go. I walked the labyrinth carefully and my tears fell before each stone laid out before my feet. I asked for a sign, I prayed for an answer, I needed to know that everything was going to be okay. I felt my road had ended and the signs were blurry. Do I stop, make a U-turn, or is this a dead end?! Just then the most gentle of all large creatures crept out from behind a small bush. I stopped and then made seemingly long eye contact with a deer. A beautiful majestic doe that in no way knew her significance of being where she was, when she was. I could have sat there for hours waiting for something so amazing to come my way, but I then began to understand that life brings us everything for a reason. The earth, the universe, mankind, it's all set up in a way that sets us in place. In time, for meaning. I knew who I was. Who I wanted to become. Free. Open. Educated. I quickly ran back to my dorm room and scribbled down my thoughts into a journal. It finally dawned on me that I was in control of my path. I was in control of who I am. Who I become and what I believe. The things that gracefully enter my life are there for a reason and I can embrace them or part ways. Since that day I've become me, of course I am still working on keeping my beliefs, my positive energy, and my own free will...but with time, it will be perfected.

Labyrinth 

 A photo I captured of my college.

Photo of me at the labyrinth


10 comments:

Shell said...

Beautiful! There are things that I've gone through, that at the time, I think are painful and awful and wish they'd never happened. And then, later, I see that if they didn't happen...I wouldn't have the life I do now.

lovemylevi said...

So very well put Shell! Thanks for summing it up in such a great way :-)

Mom's Place said...

Every day is a new page, we write it as we live it! It's up to us as to how our story is going to end!

I have an award for you this morning!

Emmy said...

Beautiful post! Life doesn't usually go how you planned it, but when you do let go and trust it usually seems to just work out for the best.

The Tucker Family said...

LOVE your blog! I am now a "follower" 

I own a blog/design/scrapbooking/photography/WAHM forum I'd love you to join called My Great Retreat (link is below). Can't wait to keep in touch!

Meghan
http://tuckerstaketennessee.blogspot.com
www.mygreatretreat.com
http://mygreatretreat.blogspot.com

dawn hild said...

Hi... I'm late (because hubby and I had a mutually grumpy/not feeling well weekend) returning the Friday Follow favor. Thanks for following me!
Dawn Hild
http://meandcraig.blogspot.com

Teresha@Marlie and Me said...

the photos are beautifully reflective of your sentiments

Redbonegirl97 said...

I love this post. You make the best at what life gives you. Thanks I kinda needed a boost this morning.

Tiffany
http://liferequiresmorechocolate.blogspot.com/

Melissa said...

That is so awesome that you found yourself. I've been looking for years for myself. I am a mom, a wife, a sister, and a friend. I know what my kids like, I know what my husband likes, and what my friends and family like, but haven't a single clue as to what I like.
I am planning a girls weekend for me and my friends in a few months and I plan to do a lot of soul searching while I'm there. No kids, no hubby, though I love them all, I want to know who I am.

lovemylevi said...

Melissa, definitely write a post about your soul searching trip, I'd love to read about how it goes!

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